Eat Your Charred Heart Out


Clearly Mola Ram knows how to party. But do YOU, dear reader? Are you prepared to satiate the masses’ roaring collective appetite for gaggles of grilled goodness that’s also good for them? Well, maybe you are. I don’t know you that well. How was your holiday weekend? How are you parents? Did you, your friends, or your family members avoid artery-clogging, processed fare this past fourth of July? I’ll go out on a limb and say yes.

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Ah, nerds! The truth hurts. But don’t be ashamed; it’s not too late for schlubs like us. Though I have tasted the heretical flavors of the forbidden brat and the verboten allure of the hot dog, that doesn’t mean that I (i.e.: you) am a lost cause. It means I am human: I have made mistakes, but I, too, have the capacity for change. Come, dear reader: change with me. Let’s flambe the summer away to our heart’s collective content. Let’s rid ourselves of unhealthy horrors but remain replete with the tastes all grill lovers (especially Madonna) cherish.


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